NYAO, Ep: 087 – The Cost of being Authentic
“This above all: to thine own self be true
And it must follow, as the night the day
Thou canst not then be false to any man”
– William Shakespeare, Hamlet
People often speak of being “Authentic”. What does it mean? How does this play out in life? Authenticity, in the context of this episode, is defined as the degree to which our actions are aligned with our values and desires- especially when there is pressure to behave differently. How closely are being true to ourselves?
With some people, we know that we can really be our true selves. We can bring everything we have to the table. We know them, and they know us down to the ground. We have true freedom and full self-expression in these relationships. We feel alive.
In other situations, we repress our thoughts or feelings under a layer. We are “inauthentic”. We have a loss of full self-expression. There are ways of being or topics we can’t touch. We feel fake or repressed.
Clearing these relationships up takes honesty and the willingness to take responsibility for letting things slide. As Raf says, sometimes we “need to put the ugly baby on the table”. Which is Melon’s new favourite English phrase.
In this conversation, you’ll hear examples of work and personal relationships where a straight conversation took place, and authenticity was restored. Your hosts distinguish between authenticity and being an ass. You can be straight and kind. You can clear up a past error and end with no negative charge in the space between you and the other person.
In all cases, you can at least get any skeletons out of your closet and out of your future. You can remove the mask and know you aren’t faking it with that person anymore.
Let us know of a time when you have restored a relationship and experienced being authentic. Try having a conversation with this aim this week- let us know how it goes.
Paul “Melon” McFadden
Raf “Tio” Espinosa